Wednesday, February 27, 2013

For All You Non-Texans Out There


I saw this this morning and just had to share it with all my non-Texas readers :). Leave me a comment and tell me which number surprised you the most!

YOU MIGHT BE A TEXAN IF..........

1. You can properly pronounce Corsicana, Palestine, Decatur, Wichita Falls, Mexia, Waco, Beaumont, Pflugerville, Kerrville, Boerne, New Braunfels, and Amarillo.

2. Your manners include: "Please", "Thank You", "Excuse me", "Ma'am" & "Sir" & you wanna punch those who don't use them.

3. A tornado warning siren is your signal to put the stuff out in the yard you wanna get rid of.

4. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.

5. You’ve ever had to switch from “heat” to “A/C”, TWICE in the same day.

6. You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by the distance to the door, but by the availability of shade.

7. Stores don’t have bags, they have sacks.

8. You see people wear bib overalls at funerals, with the utmost respect!

9. You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.

10. You measure distance in minutes or hours.

11. You refer to the capital of Texas as “home of the Longhorns.”

12. You know that the Chicken Ranch didn’t really raise chickens.

13. Little Smokies are something you serve only for special occasions.

14. You go to the lake because you know what a Bigmouth and a Striper is.

15. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit.

16. You know cowpies are not made of beef.

17. Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan a wedding date.

18. You have known someone who has had one belt buckle bigger than your fist.

19. A bad traffic jam involves two cars staring each other down at a four-way stop, each determined to be the most polite and let the other go first.

20. You know that “Damnyankee” is one word.

21. You aren’t surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, and bait all in the same store... & it's a Drive-thru.

22. You always have iced tea & cold beer available for guests.

23. A Mercedes Benz is not a status symbol. A Ford F350 diesel 4x4 is.

24. You know everything goes better with Ranch dressing or hot sauce.

25. You learned how to shoot a gun as soon as you can walk.

26. You actually like these jokes and are fixin’ to send them to your friends.

27. You know not to order a chicken fried steak using words like “rare” or “well done”.

28. You never use the word “veggies”.

29. You know where the Cotton Bowl is.

30. You are 100% Texan if you have ever heard this conversation:
“You wanna coke?”
“Yeah.”
“What kind?”
“Dr. Pepper.”
 — with Russell Keith.

* #11 is the only not true statement in this list :)We are a household of Aggie fans!

** In reference to #12, have you ever seen the movie "The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas"? :)


9 comments:

The Momma said...

Love this! Many of these are so true for an Arkansan as well. And so true about the manners :)

Kristy said...

Haha! This list is awesome!

Kacey said...

Number 17 is me! Booked my wedding date around the football (what Queenslanders think is football)!!!

ginmommy said...

Cute stuff!

Nicole said...

OK, so I'm from Tennessee, and most of this applies here as well. I had to chuckle about several!

M+W said...

Loved this! I used a football schedule for our wedding! No longhorns or orange and white in our household either :) Gig'Em Aggies! Shade trees is so true! We always park under them!

The Anglin Family said...

Check, check, check;) This applies to Arkansas, too. I'm still half Texan by blood, lol;))) except woo pig sooie!!!

Kerry said...

Well hello there my Texan friend, I have missed you! I will get to back reading all your other posts from the past 3 weeks so I can catch up with you :)
I have to say that it is fairly obvious I am not a Texan and not just because I'm Australian either lol.
I have no idea how to pronounce most of the words in #1, I do not know what you mean with #8 and you don't call vegies, vegies? What do you mean? You can't possibly say the whole word lol
I loved reading this, because a lot of it is exactly how I imagine Texans to be and I love how you all (y'all) say sir and ma'am!!! I picture the big belt buckles, cowboy hats, boots and rocking chairs on the front porch :) I want to visit Texas some day!!!!

Sandy said...

I love #12--I grew up in La Grange.

 
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