Friday, February 15, 2013

The Obligatory Selfie

I just now remembered that I never took a picture of myself taking a picture of myself. :) Aren't those things like mandatory if you get a fancy new camera??

Try number one.

Because everyone wants to see a blurry picture of an empty towel ring, my arm fat and tooth paste stuck to the wall.

Try number two.

"Hey..." I think to myself. "Now we're gettin' somewhere!"

But still I just couldn't seem to let it end there. I blame it on the barrage of on Teen Mom 2  updates that I keep getting on my Facebook page. They all look like this...

Teen Mom Farrah Abraham for those of you who don't watch crap tv like me...
I soon realize that the problem with my selfies is that I'm forgetting the teen mom sexy pucker. 

Try number three.

Operation Sexy Pucker. Oh shit. I'm 37 years old and the sexy pucker isn't working all that great for me... I clearly am in need of a suggestive straw and cherry to pull this look off. 
Maybe what I need to look more like a Teen Mom is to add mah baybee. 

Try number four.

Still not hot. I thought maybe the cute baybee would help some but really he's just accentuating my fat rolls and I end up looking really really angry. Hmm. Maybe that top part of my bra hanging out makes me look better? 
In the previous pictures I decided to throw out the sideways peace sign. I have no idea what it means. If I am unknowing throwing a Latin Kings gang sign and you are a member reading this maybe you'd like to be a new follower?

Wait... I know what to do! I'll flash some wedding bling!!

I look soo much better than Jenelle! 

And then there was a brief pause while I fished this out of the toilet...

I ultimately decided that it was time to put an end to all the selfies. Griffin was clearly running amok and I was clearly not paying enough attention.  

You all get the picture though. I got a new camera. :) I like to take pictures with it a.lot. 

Happy Friday everyone :).


The Momma said...

This.Is.Hilarious. I love it :) :) Double love :)

I love my camera. Best investment ever!

Love the way Griffin is looking at you in that picture :)

Tesha said...

LOL I am rolling in bed(because I am still here in so much pain) This is just what I needed to lift my spirits- pure hilariousness! PS I bet Bobby will think these are super HOT:)

Kacey said...

Hahahaha you're one funny lady! I can never do a good selfie but mine don't turn out as funny as yours!

ginmommy said...

Oh my gosh girl, I'm dyyyyying. Funny stuff! AND you are tre' adorable.

M+W said...

HILARIOUS! Griffin's look is priceless! He's like, "Momma what are you doing?!"

Kerry said...

Dear Hillary,
I have not laughed out loud at the computer screen for some time now, that is until tonight, this post. You had my husband wondering what the heck I was reading when I burst into a fit of laughter at your sexy teen pout with peace sign and confused baby on your hip!!! This may well be the funniest thing I have read/seen all year. Your selfie, just gorgeous...Bobby is a lucky man ;)
I love this!!!! Love it.

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