Tuesday, January 29, 2013

So Weird

So I finally told my neighbors down the street about Caroline. I had been meeting them at the bus stop for 2 and a half years and I just now told them. I mentioned to them that we'd be having a garage sale very soon to support March of Dimes and would love it if they had anything to contribute to our sale. The inevitable happened and they asked the whys? questions. I know my very brief explanation of "we had a daughter but she was stillborn and passed away (duh Hillary) and this is our way to honor her" was probably a lot to take it. I KNOW it was a lot to take in. The ladies faces said it all. One even took very visible steps away from me.

::Sigh::

What to do. What to do. I love to share my girl with people. I hate when they act like uncouth idiots about it. Maybe this was my one chance to get one of the ladies to shut up already about how  I really need to "have a little girl".

15 comments:

Jamie said...

I can't stand when people act that way either. Sometimes I have to make myself say that I'm thankful nothing like that has ever happened to them and that they have the opportunity to be so removed from a tragedy like that...not always how I feel...well, like never how I feel but I try REALLY hard at it.lol I really wish that situation had gone differently for you. And the upside is hopefully they will stop asking you now! Thinking about you and your family!! :-)

Tesha said...

Oh Gosh Hillary I am so sorry. I have experienced my fare share of idiot remarks. I don't think I am allowed to say that:)... WHO CARES! Thats excatlly how some people act. How I wish they would of given you a big hug and said, "I am so very sorry and I will be bring a BIG donation for the sale". I just don't get it? but that is the real problem they don't get it! I often share Jonathan and get the most absurd comments (especially because he was number 6) I am trying to come to a point that I hold my head up and say I don't care Jonathan is worth them feeling awkward and uncomfortable. Don't worry you did the right thing. I am going to pray that conviction strikes their hearts and they become super compassionate to you and others. Also that they show up with a pile full of valuables for the sale:) You are a wonderful mommy to Caroline! Love you!

Unknown said...

Hillary...I hope with their rudeness, they decide to donate to help such a worthy cause. I can only imagine the pain it is to lose a child; and I see how you have kept Caroline's memory alive and always will. I would be honored to join in your 5K team in March. You are a wonderful mommy to Caroline, Graham, Grady and Griffin. Thinking about you and your family. I am honored to call you my friend.

The Anglin Family said...

What Tesha said. ;)
People are insensitive and weird. Im glad you told them. She will never ask when you are having a girl again, that's for sure. I'm proud of you, even if your neighbors are dumb. Pray for them. You never know, He may be working on their hearts.
<3

Kristy said...

People can be so stupid sometimes:)
I have a question about the walk in May. How do I get involved with team Caroline and can my mom join me?

Hannah Rose said...

Ugh, it's so hard when moments like that happen...I totally understand and I'm sorry :(

ginmommy said...

You know, people are just plain stupid sometimes. INCLUDING MYSELF. However, that doesn't take away the hurt you feel. I am so sorry friend! But thank you for making us aware of how YOU feel, and how to handle these type of situations if we ever find ourselves in one similar. NOTE TO SELF: Don't be an idiot. HUGS!

Beth Ann said...

So bizarre to me to have such an odd reaction. How would it not be your first instinct to extend some sympathy and maybe a hug? Well, at least you got it out there and now they know and hopefully won't make any more comments in the future. You are brave and strong. You did it!

Tristan said...

((hugs!!!)) Share her. She is yours..and if they get uncomfortable, that's their issue.

steps away from you?? are these people serious?? ugh!!!

The Momma said...

What I have the biggest problem with is the person who stepped away from you. I am so sorry that happened to you and you are right, they acted like uncouth idiots. I am so sorry.

You are a great momma to Caroline! Praying for you, and your neighbors!

Michele said...

I'm sorry. I've had the whole 'step away' thing happen and I want to say: "Dont worry; you cant 'catch' it. Babies dying isnt something that I can pass on to you."

It will get better, hopefully, and their shock will turn to understanding and acceptance. And, hopefully, it will give them to strength to talk to you if something happens (or has happened) in their lives.

Melanie Mueller said...

Seriously? That is so disappointing!! That is the most ridiculous reaction I could imagine. SO SO SO sorry sweet sil. I know Caroline is so proud of her Mama! I am so proud to be her Aunt. Love you!!
P.S. I have been trying to comment for a few days and it finally let me. =)

rebecca said...

So sorry, people are so rude sometimes. Good for you though for talking about your Caroline and being honest with her regardless of her reaction, so awesome you guys are getting a team together in honor of her!

Kerry said...

I am shocked at some people, really I am. I am sorry you have had this reaction from people Hillary, there is so much ignorance in the world and not enough compassion :( xoxo

Elizabeth said...

Oh my goodness...don't you just want to laugh at people's reactions sometimes?? Then promptly escort them to a social skills class!? Hope you are doing well despite the craziness of other people.

 
Design by Small Bird Studios | All Rights Reserved