It's been soo long since I've blogged and I just hate hate hate it! We have had so much stuff going on so it's not like I don't have anything to blog about. I'm just finding it incrediably hard to find the time! When I'm awake these days I find myself working up a sweat trying to keep up with my 3 guys and once they are all down for bed I hit the hay too! Griffin is still up TONS at night which all just kind of adds to it. : /
Just to keep ya'll up to date (and to keep me honest) here are some of my future blog post coming up!
Griffin Is 4 Months Old!
Sausage Making ~ Mueller Style!
Grady's 1st Day of Preschool
Making Wreaths for Valentines Day
Crafting With Chalkboard Paint
Graham's 1st Season Playing Minor League Baseball
See I told you I had tons of fun stuff going on!! :)
So I showed you all the cute new clothes my Momma sent Griffin the other day. Today was the first day for him to wear one of the outfits! One was size 6 months and the other size 9 month. I put him in the 6 month outfit and boy was I glad that I did! Griffin is getting soo long that he almost didn't fit in it! Tomorrow he may have to wear the 9 month one so we can start getting some use out of it!
My Momma has a computer but doesn't use it very often so I'm not sure how often she even reads my blog posts. Hopefully today she is reading it! These pictures are for you today Mimi!
"Why Hello there."
This is seriously one of my most favorite pictures of Griffin!
He has been trying so hard to sit up lately!
Almost got it.... (and pardon the spit up)
TIMBER! :)
Goofy, sweet smile! Love my boy!
"Forget you mom, I got bears on my feet!!"
I tried soo hard to get Griffin to look at me but the bears were more fun :).
Valentine's Day is creeping up on me and ya'll, this is one of my most favorite holidays! I love the memories I have of elementary school and getting to decorate my very own shoe box with wrapping paper, sticker, markers, and ribbon. I loved the sweet surprise of opening the box at the end of the class party and seeing all the notes from friends (and crushes :) and little boxes of heart shaped candy!
Another reason why I love this holiday is that its so close to my birthday! (My birthday is February 10th for all those wishing to send gifts.. HA!) I love that I get to have that "someone special" feeling for an entire week!
I am so over joyed to be able to share all these feeling of love with my 3 little Valentines on Valentines Day! I love to make this day EXTRA special just in case there is any doubt in their little minds that their Momma and Daddy are their biggest fans! :)
I've already been looking online for cute t-shirts (they've been a little hard to find this year :( ), cards etc. I started looking through Tiny Prints to get some ideas for sending out Valentines cards for friends, family and even classmates! I am so far in LOVE with these two!
I thought that Graham would love this one! Like I was saying before, somethings are starting to get a little "babyish" to him but I bet he wouldn't mind taking this one to pass out to his classmate! How cute would this be with a little candy taped to it!
Wouldn't Grady be so cute taking this card to school to pass out to his new friends! I love these cards because they come already personalized with the kids names of them! You know how I like to make things easy right :). It's so easy to follow Tiny Prints on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest. They just have soo much ding dang cute stuff! Are you starting to get ready for Valentines Day yet? Do you decorate your house or just celebrate the day itself?
My awesome SIL, Stacy, is putting together a March of Dimes team for the upcoming walk. I'm super excited about this! Anything to remember Caroline and help out other families is what I'm about! We are trying to think up a name for our group. Any fun ideas? Caroline's Crew was already taken :(, but some others that we have come up with are Caroline's club, clique, crowd... I had thought Caroline's Cuties, but since there will be men walking with us I wasn't sure how they would feel. Seriously if you have a fun name idea let me know!
Bobby's sister Stacy got married a couple of weeks ago. I just haven't had it in me to post about it. I missed 90% of the actual ceremony because Griffin started shriek the second that the minister started to speak. I had to take him out :(. The ceremony (of what I saw) and the reception were beautiful though!!
Please pardon my "comfy" wedding shoes :)
Grady is starting preschool this week! He will be going on Monday's and Wednesday's. He will be going just this Friday for a fun try-out day. I'm a little sad and a little scared. It's a first for both of us...
Graham's birthday is coming up soon (the beginning of March) and I'm already starting to plan. He'll be turning 10 :( and I think that this will be the last year for "big" parties. Its hard to plan parties for older boys I'm finding out. Some things are becoming too babyish for him. I'm thinking of renting one of those Game Trucks. Have ya'll heard of those?
My Momma sent Griffin a couple of new outfits in the mail. I adore checking the mail and getting something other than bills :).
Ya'll my laundry situation is getting soo bad. I can keep up with getting everything washed and dried, but NOTHING folded and put away. I'm starting to have anxiety attacks about it. I spent several hours on it this weekend and still only got part of it sorted. Sorted. That's it. Sigh...
I swear that Griffin is getting cuter by the day, if I do say so myself :). His expressions and little attitude are starting up.
"What."
My nephew Colton just celebrated his 9th birthday! It was at a fun Laser game place and my boys had a BLAST! I did not do my best at taking hardly any pictures while I was there :(.
Graham was having such a great time that I could not hardly get him to look at me for a picture!
Bobby and I were dying laughing at Grady while he tried to play Dance Dance Revolution. He was trying so hard!
I'm sure that I could think of 47 other random things that have been going on in the crazy Mueller household. But I really need to get back to that laundry!
One year ago today I my dreams came true! I can't believe how rich and full and changed my life has become in one short year.
It's pretty hard to see the second lines but if you click on the picture you can see them much better!
I remember the day and night of the 21st with such clarity. You can read my post from that day here! We had an awesome day as a family that day and then that night my curiosity got the better of me and I took a test :). I know that I've told and re-told the story several times here but I'll share again! I knew in my heart that I was testing waaaaay too early. Like 7 or 8 days before I even was set to miss my period. I knew the test specifically said only to do it 6 day before a missed period but I was soo incredibly impatient that I just couldn't wait another second. I felt in my heart that I WAS pregnant and I was dying to see proof of it!
On the first test that I took, the line was so crazy faint that I thought that my eyes might be playing tricks on me. I know you other ladies will agree with me... you stare at a test for so stinkin' long and your eyes start to focus on the control line and then you start to see double of everything... :)
I took the test into my closet to see if the light was any different in there and I still felt like that I could "maybe" see a line. I looked at the test in the kitchen light, the laundry room light, the living room light (in case there was any doubt in your head left, I AM THAT CRAZY LADY!). I was finally able to bug Bobby into really analyzing the test with me and he agreed that he too could maybe see a line forming!
I told myself 4000 times not to get my hopes up too much because a.) it was still really early and b.) we had suffered a miscarriage before.
The next morning I jumped up at 5 am to test again (the second test in the picture :). Still positive and this time there was no doubt in my mind that there was a line! It wasn't super dark but then again I wasn't supposed to start for almost another week.
I, once again, needed to see something more concrete so I took the above test just minutes after the above one. I LOVED seeing that one word, "PREGNANT"! The joy that my sore, broken heart felt was soo unbelievable. It was literally like a balm to my soul.
Funnily enough, these were not the only two test I took :). A couple of weeks later my nerves got the better of me and I took some more. I have no idea why other than I still needed more reassurance.
I swear, I'm that lady that keeps HPT companies in business!
On a gross side note, I saved them all. I saved the 2 I took with Grady, 2 of the ones from Caroline, and now all of these with Griffin! One day, many years from now, my boys will be going through all their baby keepsakes, find these and be thoroughly grossed out :).
I still can't believe how far we've come in a year. I can't believe that there are 3 little boys riding in a row when I turn my head in my car. I can't believe that there are 3 bedrooms upstairs each filled with little men more precious than their weight in gold. I can't believe the noisy racket coming from the other room from the 3 of them as I type all of this :).
Thank ya'll all soo much for you kind thoughts and words yesterday. I still feel a little bit "off" after having had that dream the other night. It's just such an odd feeling to have to feel blessed, awe-struck and scared all rolled into one.
I feel really overwhelmed right now at the tangible presence of God and his love in Griffin's room the other night. I certainly know of his love for me but to have felt it so strongly.... I hardly knew what to do with the emotions that came with it.
Psalm 13: 5-6
I love that God appeared to me at a time when I needed him the most and didn't even know it (even if it was at 3:00 in the morning :). I realize now that for as much as God has been seeking little 'ole me out, I need to seek big 'ole Him out even more.
I wonder sometimes if this is how people who win the lottery feel :). Such intense joy, such peace of mind!
Have you ever felt the Lord so closely that you were certain He was standing right behind you?
This week I'm joining up with Jamie to participate in What I'm Loving Wednesday!
This week I'm loving ONE big thing! It's our little Griffin's nursery!
We started this really late (like after he was born). As most of you know I was really really chicken about starting on it. I really felt like I would be jinxing my pregnancy if I did anything.
So finally its almost done! It hasn't bothered me too much that Griffin is a little over 3 months old and it just now finished. He really only just moved out of our bedroom and into his room a couple of weeks ago :).
With out further ado...
This is the view as you walk into Griffin's room!
As you round the corner into Griffin's room, this becomes your view! I love that my sweet littlest boy got such a wonderful spacious room to grow and play in!
I love that we were able to put Griffin's crib against this wall. It is the farthest away from Grady's room that I could move it. This way (hopefully!) they won't wake each other up at night!
This is Griffin's changing table. For whatever reason, he loves it! Maybe its getting a clean tush that makes him smile so big or it could be the little black and white zebra on the wall... :)
I love his toy keeper. It helps me to keep the room tidy!
This is some artwork that Graham did to help contribute to Griffin's room decor. I gave him the paint and the canvas and told him to paint whatever he wanted too! I love it!
This is Griffin's crib. I wished he loved to sleep in it a little more :). And, don't worry, I take all those little pillows out at night. The super cute bumper will be coming out soon too. :( He has started inch-worming his way around in there...
I'm in love with these decoupaged letters that I did for him! I will love them even more once they are hung up!
I love that this holds soo many little clothes!! I even love the glass fronts because I'm practically forced to keep the drawers tidy!
I love this rocker. It used to be the one in Grady's room. It was crazy expensive, but like I told Bobby, if I'm going to be up all hours of the night, I darn well better be comfortable!! :)
Mother's LOVE
I love this little picture frame in his room! Bobby wasn't with me at my 16 week ultrasound when we found out we were having our 3rd boy so I went and grabbed this frame and put the" big reveal" picture in it!
I also love my handy-work with making this wreath! I had made this to hang on the hospital door when we had Griffin. It now looks super cute in his room!
I hope that everyone has LOVED touring Griffin's nursery with me!
I had a dream about Caroline last night. It was my first and only one so far since she left us. In the early days after her passing I spent most night with my best friend Ambien and I'm sure that prevented any dreams that might have come. I'm grateful for it. I could not have handled any dreams of her then.
I almost couldn't handle the dream I had last night. I guess I could tell you the long and winding version of my dream but it was all so bizarre that it almost didn't make sense to me so I'll save you from having to read all about it. Sufficed to say, she was ALIVE! And I got to hold her ALIVE! She didn't have that too tiny to live look about her (if you've lost a child you know what I'm talking about). She still looked small to me in my dream but not sickly small. She looked like a real baby. Like how I would have loved and give my right leg to see her look. Her little eyes were open and not still fused shut. She was soo beautiful! I knew in my dream that she would still pass away but I was able to hold her in my arms and not my womb when she passed.
I don't remember how much more I dreamed because the next thing I knew I could hear Griffin on the monitor. I crept up to his room and as I entered it I could see his beautiful little smiling face. The little stink was wide awake and calling for me :). Bless his heart, when I scooped him up he had leaked out of his diaper and through his jammies and swaddler. As I changed him on his changing table (for some reason his favorite place to be) he continued to smile and coo at me. I can not tell you how HEAVEN SENT these moments were! I went from the confusion of a welcomed nightmare into such unconditional love and devotion from my earthly baby!
As I rocked and nursed Griffin back to sleep I said a silent prayer of thanks to God for the moments he provided me with my 2 babies that night.
Recently I've been trying to come up with ideas that allow me to contribute monetarily to our family. I thoughts of tons of things including at home child care, opening my own etsy shop and even adding Ads to my blog.
The last one seemed the easiest so I started there first. I figured all I would need to do is apply the Ads which Blogger will let you do in a heartbeat. I started them up around two weeks ago. To get the ball rolling I told close friends and family about them and how they would really help generate a little extra income for us!
It seems that friends and family were VERY generous in their endeavor to help me out :).
Below is the email I received...
After reviewing our records, we've determined that your AdSense account
poses a risk of generating invalid activity. Because we have a
responsibility to protect our AdWords advertisers from inflated costs due
to invalid activity, we've found it necessary to disable your AdSense
account. Your outstanding balance and Google's share of the revenue will
both be fully refunded back to the affected advertisers.
I'm a little sad that I have just barely gotten started and now this is something that I can't count on. I read the rules before I started and it states pretty clearly that I myself am not allowed to click on the ads themselves. I was unaware that they would tally up how many times an Ad was clicked on from various IP addresses. I wish I was warned about that too so I could have passed that info on to well meaning friends and family. I'm sure that it was mentioned somewhere in all the small print that I neglected to read. :/.
So, word to the wise friends, if you decide to apply Ads to your blogs, BEWARE!
(oh and I'm also not sure of why Blogger is cutting some of my words in half and wrapping them around to the next line. So weird.)
First off, thank ya'll all so much for the sweet comments about my hair picture! I too love how the color came out and I hope that I'll be able to keep it up! To those of you who asked if I had lost weight after I had Griffin, I have a little bit. I still have about 20 (gag) pounds left to loose before I hit the same weight that I was when I got pregnant. Truth be told, I'd like to loose about 40 more pounds. To get that picture, I took a picture of myself 900 times shifting my head slightly each and every time I took a picture. I then spent an hour and a half picking the one that looked the best. Just kidding. But only about how long it took me to pick out a picture. I really did take 900 :).
Bobby and I have been tossing around the idea of joining weight watchers online. Anyone else try it yet?
Bobby's little sister is getting married this weekend. We are super excited for her and her fiance. They make such a cute couple and he'll be an awesome addition to the family! I can't wait to get pictures and post them on here.
I'm silly ya'll and I read all sorts of random blogs. One that I came across a while back is about a little boy that is suffering from a serious skin condition/disease call EB. His darling mother has just been told that it won't be much longer before Tripp will be joining Jesus in Heaven. Tripp is only 2 years old and has pretty much endured more pain and suffering than you and I could even imagine. Can you go and visit them and offer your prayers up for his family? I just cried and cried when I read his Momma's last post. I dread the next time she posts again...
I just discovered today that Griffin is a BIG fan of the movie, Gnomeo and Juliet. Have you seen it? It's beyond cute with the greatest music (if you are an Elton John fan :). I had Griffin propped up in his Nap Nanny while I was making Grady lunch and I could hear Griffin actually LAUGHING at it! He has started to do the funniest little gurgle laugh these days and I guess that all the dancing an singing really got him going!!
I thought that I would be so sad but instead I find myself smiling, remembering my sweet Caroline and thinking of just how darn CUTE my baby is!
The above picture is my sweet Griffin's attempt at a smile for me :). I'm so proud of my thriving little guy. The outfit is size 6 months and it fits him perfectly today!
Glory to God for giving me a baby to fill this sweet outfit!
With my sister-in-law Stacy's wedding coming up this weekend, I had to do something about my crazy hair. I have had zero time, money, or energy to keep it up and I had some horrible roots going on! I decided that now was the time to make a little time and try and get things back on track with my poor hair.
I had the sweet lady who cut it try and guess what my original color was (haha) and dye it back to that. At least this way when it grows out the roots won't be noticeable.
Note to self : get brows waxed and buy darker makeup.
I think that it came out a little bit darker than what my real color is but I still really like it!! There is just nothing like having someone else wash and style your hair. I don't know how they can get my hair soo straight! I wished that it could look like this everyday!
What do you think? Am I better as a blond or a brunette?
So ya'll know I'm a dork right? :) Of course you do! You have been reading me for a while now I'm guessing and most of ya'll are still here! It seriously drove me bonkers-crazy yesterday only being able to write just a smidgen of what I wanted to. With handwriting there is only just so much space. That and my hand gets really tired, really fast. Its just soo much easier to type and so much faster. So long rambling paragraph short, I wanted to do a little fill-in recap of yesterdays post so you could read everything that I wished I could share but didn't!
Ok, so the first 3 were pretty self explanatory so I'll skip right to...
4. As you all must know by now my all time favorite quote is the one that is in my header. It spoke volumes to me on my deepest, darkest days. It's what carried me through on the drives to and from the funeral home (and there were heart-wrenching multiples of those). It's what carried me through my pregnancy with Griffin when I was so scared I couldn't hardly sleep most nights. I recently stumbled upon another verse that has now taken hold in my heart!
"All the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be. "
Psalm 139:16
I love it's promise that God is in control of all of us, in everything we do. It takes the weight off of my shoulders of feeling that I have to micro-manage everything. I now feel soo much free-er to turn it all over to God and just say to him "Your will be done.". FREEING!
5. Ya'll I just love The Fray! If you haven't heard this song before, here it is!
6. My favorite book is one that I just discovered last year! It's also the very first one I added to my Kindle.
This book is an awesome mixture of suspense, romance, history, and current times. I just LOVED IT! Ms. Howe just did an awesome job in writing this book. I may just re-read it again now that I'm talking about it :).
7. My two favorite movies pretty much run along the same lines of how I like my books. Historical and suspenseful!
I love to watch things that make me think that are not too scary but just scary enough! :)
8. So onto the things that frighten me most... My first knee-jerk reaction was to say heights or snakes. But once I seriously thought about it, I realized that the one thing that I worry about most (like every single day) is something might happen to my family or my friends. I've experienced some pretty bad losses already in my life (my best friend and maid of honor in my wedding was tragically killed less than a month after my wedding, my father's passing, and the loss of Caroline) and sometimes I think that my brain has become programmed to expect more to come. I know in reality that this is not the case but it still doesn't seem to help the irrational portion of my mind. I worry soo much that Bobby might be in a terrible car accident because he commutes to work for soo many hours each day. I also worry about someone abducting one of my children. I know I am probably a total looney-toon... Anyone else have these same fears?
9. This question was easy! :) My dream job would 100% have to be working in a museum! I graduated from college with a Bachelors of Arts in History. If I didn't have a husband and children (which was my number one goal) this is what I would be pursuing!
10. The last question was way too easy also and very self explanatory! To have the ability to be with my wonderful hubby forever and to know that my kids are successful at life is the most important to me! The last part about writing a book is just a quiet goal of mine that I would love to see achieved one day :).
I saw the neatest thing last year on someones blog. I only wish that I remembered where I had seen it so I could give them credit! Basically its a short list of questions that you answer in your own hand and then take a picture of it! This was such a fun project to work on because it really made me stop and think about myself for just a second.
I realized a couple of funny things about myself.
My handwriting gets worse the longer I write. My poor fingers are soo used to only typing. How sad!
Some of the questions really made me stop and think about my life. I loved this aspect of this project.
I had such a hard time not going into much detail as I didn't have a lot of room to write! It makes me want to do a whole other post tomorrow just to explain myself and some of my choices. Maybe I'll do just that!
I really can NOT live with out spell check. I am horrible at spelling! :)
So, here are the questions!
1. What is your name and the name of your blog?
2. What is your URL?
3. Write out " The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog." so that all letters of the alphabet can be seen!
4. What is your favorite scripture?
5. What is your favorite song and who sings it?
6. What is your favorite book?
7. What are your favorite movies?
8. What scares you the most?
9. What is your dream job?
10. If you had 3 wishes what would they be? (and you can NOT say, "a million dollars, world peace, or everlasting life"
A torn up living room because all 3 boys had such an awesome time playing together! I seriously never mind this because its just sooo much better than hearing "I'm bored!" or "He's touching me!" :) Oh and ignore my dead Christmas tree in the corner...
A tray of brownies devoured out of the pan with a fork by me ready to be cut and placed on a cute dish . If you follow me on Facebook you'll already now that I found a box of brownie mix hiding in my pantry on Friday and I just about DIED of excitement!
Wasting waaaay too much time spent cruising Pinterest for new home decorating, party, and craft ideas!
A brand new SUPER-SIZED box of disinfecting wipes for my bathroom. Boys are disgusting ya'll!! :)
An empty laundry basket! (need I say more?)
Chocolate chip muffins for breakfast. I spent a whole 4 seconds sticking left -over party decorations in them and the boys just about lost their marbles to eat them!
Hi! I'm Hillary, stay at home Momma to 3 precious boys here on earth and one sweet little girl in Heaven. I'm lucky enough to be married to the love of my life Bobby for the past 12 years. I hope you enjoy our journey together!
Graham is my sweet 10 year old. He's sometimes wild, sometimes crazy but always loads of fun! He's a great best friend and a history nut. Graham loves Lego's, swimming, and chapter books!
Grady is my very silly but always loveable 4 year old. He's our wildcard and we're always on the lookout for what he'll get into next. Grady loves root beer, backyard adventures, and his brother's Lego's.
Griffin is our adorable 11 month old and newest family member! Already in his short little life he has brought much joy and renewed HOPE to all of us. Griffin loves to move around, eat yogurt puffs, and his paci.
Caroline Elizabeth is our sweet little girl. Her young life ended when she was born much too soon. We celebrate her life and her birthday every October 15th. We all consider her to be the guardian angel over our family!
