Caroline Elizabeth and Ashley Elizabeth

I received a great Facebook message yesterday :). It was from one of my dearest friend's Momma.

I just wanted to share something special with you. I had a dream about Ashley. Maybe I should say Ashley came to me in a dream, which she often does. In my dream she was playing with Caroline Elizabeth and taking care of her. Caroline was laughing and smiling. I woke up with the greatest sense of peace and happiness. In my heart I felt like Ashley was telling me to tell you that Caroline is happy and she is taking care of her for you. I hope this doesn't upset you. I prayed about it before telling you so I hope I made the right decision. I think of you so often and I'm so proud of all the things you've done to honor your daughter as I have tried to honor mine. We have that in common. I will never let Ashley's memory die and you'll never let sweet Caroline's memory fade. It makes some people uncomfortable but that's their problem not ours. Some people don't understand how important it is to remember our loved ones who have gone to Heaven and it's very hurtful. I had a bad experience last week that hurt me deeply. I also had a wonderful experience helping some parents who lost their son, which we have done often since we lost Ashley. It helps us to help others who have gone through the same thing. I sense that you've reached out to help others too and I'm so proud of you. Sending my love and hugs to you. I hope this doesn't upset you, but gives you peace. I know Ashley has come to you too or I wouldn't have mentioned it. Love you Hillary! Linda

When I was in college (many many years ago :) I met the most amazing girl who quickly became my very best friend. We were roommates for years! We went through thick and thin together! She was one of the maids of honor in my wedding. In 2001, 3 weeks after my wedding she was shot and killed while driving down the road. Her nightmare is here.

To say that I was devastated is an understatement. I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, and was beyond depressed.  My very best friend was gone overnight. 

I still remember the morning that I got the news. Bobby and I were happy newlyweds that had just moved. We were living in a rural area with almost no cell phone service and a home phone line that had not yet been set up. A sheriff cruiser pulled up to our home to tell me. I wanted to vomit on the spot. 

Its been 11 years now and I still think about her almost everyday. I saved every picture of her and every funny note or letter she ever sent me. I miss her so badly. Every big event in my life I want and need to share with her and can't. I hate it. 

When we had our little Caroline, Bobby and I quickly decided that our little girl should have the same middle name as my bestie. I thought that there could be nothing better for the two to share (other than Heaven :) as names!

Ashley's birthday is coming up this next Saturday (St. Patty's Day!) and I've been thinking about her a lot. I was beyond excited to hear from her mother and to learn of her dream. It's always been my wish that they were together. :)

College days! :)